Have you ever asked, "Why am I here on earth?" or "What is my purpose?" or "Have I done all I am supposed to do?"
I have often. I question whether I am being or have been all I should have been. Two things that have happened in the past couple of months have really caused me to look at my life and my obligations.
First, I decided to go back to teaching as a substitute. I knew that I had to be careful not to make too much money or the retirement system would deduct it from my retirement check. I took a somewhat long term position and committed to staying till Christmas. I did not complete that obligation because I didn't figure the money out correctly. Now this would not have been a problem if I had not felt that I failed.
I love teaching and I was really enjoying working with the kids and the other people at school. So when I could not finish out the term it broke my heart. I would have done it for free if that was a possibility but it was not. I got very depressed, as I often do. It has taken a lot to get out of that cycle of depression. I am still dealing with it in a lot of ways.
Depression is real, and has been part of my life and the life of MANY throughout history. King David suffered from depression at times. I really think we all do, and it comes in so many forms... Bipolar, Postpartum, or Dysthymia, and others. No one should be ashamed of any of these. Seeking out help is important, unfortunately many people do not seek that help, or the help isn't helping like it used to help. Sometimes it is so overwhelming that it causes a person to try to end it in a permanent way. Hence the latest reason I am questioning my purpose and obligations.
A friend, for whatever reason, has tragically ended her precious life. She will be missed by so many and this has caused me to think about my obligations, my purpose, my reason for being on the earth.
Here is the reason I am here...
"Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:19-20
The reason I am here on earth, is to teach and be a witness for the Lord. In this situation I didn't do my due diligence. I never asked my friend what she believed. Now don't get me wrong, I believe she was a believer. She lived a life that said she was, I just should have spoken with her more about Christ and living for Him. I should spoken to her about her feelings and asked if I could help. I could see she was struggling. I did pray for her, that should have been enough but sometimes knowing someone cares speaks a lot more that just saying a prayer.
So, in light of the loss of this precious life, I am taking this opportunity to witness to all my friends and family who will read this. I will reach out personally where and when I can.
"For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures, and that he appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve." 1 Corinthians 15:3-5
"Christ died for our sins and rose from the dead." This is the message of the verses above, it is all you have to believe to get to heaven. It takes nothing more than believing that Christ died for you and that He is now alive. Know that He loved you enough to give up His life for yours. Yes, it is simple to get to heaven, just believe... truly believe.
That is not all that we should desire. I desire to serve Him to the best of my ability but witnessing, and doing what he has called me to do... Teach! It is my prayer that all my friends and family that read this blog will accept Christ's Love and Life. And if you are struggling reach out to me or someone you trust to talk to.Do NOT let depression get the best of you!
If you live in the Kinder, Louisiana area, come to my Sunday School class I would love to have you join us, as would all the ladies. You can find a link to the class below.
I hope this all makes sense, it is written from a heart of love, with a desire to work toward fulfilling God's reason for placing me here on this earth. To fulfill my purpose and obligation to witness and teach. Thank you for reading this and I pray you all are blessed by God.
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